Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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