Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!

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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.

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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.

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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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