Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!

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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.

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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.

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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".

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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.

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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.

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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.

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