Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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