Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!

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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.

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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.

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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore

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