Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!

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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel

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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.

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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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