Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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