Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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