Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed.
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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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