Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That isn't funny!
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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