Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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