Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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