Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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