Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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