Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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