Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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