Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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