Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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