Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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