Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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