Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .

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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.

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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.

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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.

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