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Why was the math book sad?
It had too many problems.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?
That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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Why do cows go to New York?
To see the moosicals
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?
Breaking up is hard to do.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?
The scales.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?
The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What has one horn and gives milk?
A milk truck.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
HeHe
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What can you hold without ever touching it?
A conversation.
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