Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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A seal walks into a club...
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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