Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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