Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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