Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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