Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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