Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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