Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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