Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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