Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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