Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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