Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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