Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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