Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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