Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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