Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.

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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.

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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog

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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos

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