Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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