Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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