Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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