Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.

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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights

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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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