Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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