Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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