Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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