Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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