Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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