Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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