Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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