Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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