Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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