Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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