Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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