Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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