Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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