Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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