Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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