Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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