Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.
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