Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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