Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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