Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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