Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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