Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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