Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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