Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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