Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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