Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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