Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.

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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.

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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.

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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck

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