Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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