Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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