Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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