Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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