Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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