Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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