You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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