You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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