What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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