What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.

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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.

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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.

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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.

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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon

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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.

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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison

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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet

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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.

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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.

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