What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends

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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.

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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.

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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.

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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.

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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.

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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.

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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.

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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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