What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.

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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.

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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood

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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.

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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends

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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos

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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.

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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.

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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.

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