How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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