Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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