How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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