Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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