What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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