What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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