What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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