What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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