What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth

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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.

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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog

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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood

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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.

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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.

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