What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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