How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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