Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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