And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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