What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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