Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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Name four men that are in a rock group together but none of them sing nor play music...

Mt Rushmore. They're a rock group.. it's a rock...group
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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