When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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They stopped a vulture from bringing his rotting carcasses on the plane

but he said "You said I could have two carry on items!"
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Name four men that are in a rock group together but none of them sing nor play music...

Mt Rushmore. They're a rock group.. it's a rock...group
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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