What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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