What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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