How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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