What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.

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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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