How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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