How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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