What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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