What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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