What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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