Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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