What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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