If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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