What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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